Getting out of my head and into my heart – again!
Trusting in the Universe. Trusting in the Universe. Trusting in the Universe. If I keep saying that over and over again my heart will calm down, right? Because it is beating too fast. I must be a master manifester. I talk about an idea, a desire, an intention and then it happens. I intentioned my own husband into life. Seriously.
When I was 24 years old I packed a huge backpack (like the mountain climbing ones where you can hike for miles and miles with everything on your back) and I flew to Mexico by myself. I was thinking I’d stay anywhere from 3 months to a year. I didn’t know anyone, had no place to stay lined up. There are a number of reasons and back stories to this story but one thing was for sure…I was making a geographic move to try and change my life. They say you’re not supposed to do that. They say you can’t run from your problems. I beg to differ. Anyway I had a long list of reasons why none of the boyfriends I’d had in the past were good. They weren’t bad, I’m just really picky. I guess you could say I didn’t lack confidence and I felt like I deserved the best. So I wrote a journal entry about everything I knew I didn’t want and everything I absolutely wanted in my perfect partner. Then I met him. And I’m still married to him – 13 years later.
It would seem that it would be all fairy tale like, happiness and glittery to be naturally gifted at manifesting. I’m a normal person though. I am rushed getting out the door and I yell at my kids to hurry up and I get frustrated making dinner and I don’t live on a beach in Mexico – yet.
I’ve created this wicked awesome life. And it keeps getting better, even though I sometimes wake up anxious that there is something else out there for me and I just want to know what it is. And yes, sometimes I question if I’m serving enough or doing enough. Then here I am freaking out because what I’ve intentioned is actually happening. It is happening and I’m not making it happen. All I did was intention it and then these little things happen to come together to make it happen.
I get it. I’m in my head. That is were I am. I’ve jumped out of my heart and into my head. All I want to do right now is support my own intention. It is like this other person is chattering at me and blaming me for intentioning things that don’t make sense. There isn’t a clear business plan and therefore it is craziness and non sensible. I’m in my head freaking out. It sure is an uncomfortable place to be, let me tell you. I thought I might hyperventilate this morning (ok, that is a bit dramatic). But I know this process, I’ve been here before. It is a familiar place and as much as it makes sense that I ‘should’ be freaking out…I choose to say no to that game. Silly person in my head. Ego. Whatever you call it. It certainly isn’t serving me.
Watch me as I wiggle my way out of my head and into my heart. Back into my heart. Slow and easy now. The place that is full of love and trust. The place that longs to write, to create, to connect. The place that has a burning desire to do cartwheels and tell everyone I meet that I love them.
It is my intention to be a Love Agent. It is my intention to experience a life of abundance. It is my intention to live in my heart and in joy. Oh yes sweet Universe…I trust you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.