Gratitude in the Dark

I woke up this morning and as much as I LOVE a rainy morning I couldn’t help but feel the darkness in a sad way. I love light, I love sunshine, I love blue skies. Lately we’ve had cloudy days and as beautiful as the colors on the trees want to be, they just haven’t held the magic for me lately. It was loud, the sound of dreaded darkness in my normal morning routine.  Finally I just allowed it to speak to me. Darkness. It swirled around me. It is there when I wake up in the morning. It doesn’t get light until past 7am. Tomorrow is November 1st. Alex reminded me of daylight savings this weekend. More darkness is coming. My nights will disappear into darkness.

My happy sunshine smile was not happy this morning and I didn’t like that at all. I love being happy. It has become a habit and it is a habit I absolutely love. Darkness can’t have that much power can it? I couldn’t pretend anymore. I decided to sit down and have a real conversation with this darkness that felt so unhappy in my heart. The conversation took a whole 10 seconds.
Gratitude.
Right, silly me, I forgot. So I pulled out my notebook and I got grateful.

I’m grateful for the Darkness.
When there is darkness in the morning and early in the evening it means Thanksgiving is coming.

I’m grateful for Thanksgiving. I have so much to be thankful for. I love food and my family!
When it is dark out the kids come in to play. They no longer are out until bedtime. Board games, art projects, good movies and popcorn. I love family game night. Tag in the dark, in the house, is actually huge amounts of fun.

I’m grateful for my home, my family and the lights we get to turn on at night. I LOVE my home. I love our furniture, the colors, the art.
When it is dark out I light candles. I’m grateful for beautiful candles and romantic lighting.

Winter is coming. I’m grateful for the beauty of snow falling, walking in the middle of the road, quiet all around, knee deep in snow. And I’m grateful we are able to escape to Mexico. Our annual Mexico trip is less than two months away. I love getting excited for our huge family trip to Puerto Vallarta. I love our family in PV. I love the beaches, the ocean, speaking Spanish, the early morning Leo walks, the loud Mexican music and all the people we love soooooo much!

I’m grateful I get to experience four seasons. I mean REALLY experience four seasons. I love change. I love reflecting. I love feeling renewed, rejuvenated and ready for what is around the corner.

I’m grateful I can rock cute boots, fall colors, short skirts and scarves. I’m grateful that I have clothes, that I’m warm and that I’m well fed, educated and supported by inspiring, loving people. I’m so blessed. The darkness is here, the cold is coming but a warm fire will bless my home and I have a big comfy bed to curl up in every night. There are so many people that are without.

There are so many people that live in darkness no matter the season. I have light. I have life. I am grateful for dark days and this opportunity to practice gratitude. To practice filling myself up with light so that I can step out into the world and bring it to others.

My gratitude comes from the Universe and touches me gently on the shoulder, whispers sweetly in my ear. Darkness can bring about sadness if I allow it. Today I hung out with darkness for awhile and acknowledged the beauty it brings in its own special way. As I did just that, as I turned it around I felt light filling up inside of me. For that I’m grateful. I’m so so so grateful.